It was a very nice afternoon, but a very difficult one! We ordered Outback since that was the last dinner Steve and I had before I went into labor last year. I always used to say Andrew had some chubby outback onion ring cheeks! Such sweet, kissable cheeks.
We finally spread Andrew's ashes behind the river in Steve's dads house. This is such a special place for Steve as he has many good family memories there. We both really wanted this to be the place where we let go of Andrew's ashes which was a blessing.
We also let go of 12 balloons with messages for Andrew. We originally were going to do 10 for each day he was here with us, but it turns out we had 12 family members. It was really neat to watch them float up in the air, as they all stayed closely together. We thought they would probably all go in different directions, but they stayed side by side!
It was so good for us to grieve together with our families over Andrew. I know it would have been much easier to keep busy with other things that weekend and not really face the reality that Andrew is not here with us. But I have learned from my sweet friend Rebecca and Celebrate Recovery to fully embrace the pain of grief. That not talking about it only extends the pain and does not allow room for healing. It is not a fun process by any means, but it is a healing one that allows us to let go little by little.
Below is a verse that I read that Sat morning from my CR bible. I thought it was so appropriate for that day and an encouragement from above to be real, and face with God's grace, what otherwise would have been an unbearable day for us.
"Therefore I will not keep silent
I will speak out in the anguish of my spirit,
I will complain in the bitterness of my soul"
Job 7:11
My mom and I
My mom in law
