The Journey

A couple of years ago my University of Tampa mentor gave me a mug that said "Its about the journey, not the destination". I was quite frustrated with my MBA program at the time and ready to quit. I just wanted to get it over with! But even if I could have bought the certification somehow it would have been worthless. The worth of my MBA degree is what I learned in the process.

This past Saturday my husband and I went to his dad's house to watch the UF-Alabama game with his family. I was very excited to actually bring something to eat for everyone- my half made four layer Mexican dip (its supposed to be seven-layers!). Steve's dad was also making Spritz butter cookies for everyone. Somehow he messed up the recipe and he had to throw away the dough… and he seemed frustrated and kind of upset. I tried to save the day by running to the computer and googling the recipe online. I quickly printed it and brought it back to him proudly thinking it would solve the problem.

To my surprise he was still upset even after fixing the recipe. As I was cutting onions in the kitchen a light bulb went off in my head… it was not the cookies he cared about, it was the process of making the cookies. In past Christmas seasons his mom would bake the cookies, and it was a fun and joyous event for the family. The cookies could have tasted horrible- but the conversations, the laughter, and the fellowship is what it was really all about. This year his mom was in heaven and so was his first grandchild. And he missed them.

I was very humbled by this experience. I realized I don't have to have the right answers to other people's problems. When my family or friends called me when they are struggling with something, I don't have to have a magical solution to solve their problems! I am learning that just being is enough. That's the beautiful healing power of fellowship.

That same evening my dad called me from Venezuela to tell me how much he missed seeing me and my sisters during Christmas. I intuitively wanted to tell him that it was ok and he should be thankful for what he had. I wanted to share bible verses on God's love and His plan for us. But instead for the first time in many years, I just listened. And it was enough.

That was a life-changing moment for me!

Someone told me Christ sometimes does not always give us what we ask for right away, because he uses the process or time in between to draw us in a closer relationship with Him. At first I thought someone made this up to make me feel better about whatever I was going through at the time. And to me it sounded kind of cruel. But its true… looking back at my life I know I seek out God the most when I am at the bottom, and rarely at the top. I seek Him out when I am in situations I can't understand, because I rest in knowing God is always in control no matter what my emotions tell me.

Its funny, initially I turn to Christ mainly because of what He can give me- for his promises of prosperity, deliverance, and blessings. But in the process I get to know Him for who He is and not for what He can give me. As pastor Todd would say it- I begin to seek His face instead of His hand.

Yes, Christ has the power to give me all the things I ask for- but then where would our relationship be?

And at the end of it all I am humbled and thankful to say its all worth it.