When I was a few months pregnant, Jack and I went down to Anna Maria Island for the day as I blogged about here.
While we were at the beach, there was a group of four little boys under 5 years old playing with each other. They had built a fortress and a little pond and were having a blast! It was really fun to watch them, and Jack was sitting next to me watching them play too. Their mom must've felt bad for us staring at them by ourselves, because she came over and asked Jack if he wanted to play with them to which he quickly said 'Yes!!'
At that moment I really wished for Jack to have a little brother to play with, and of course thought about how it 'might have been' like had Andrew been with us. I hoped that Jack would have another brother one day.
But another part of me wished for a girl. My dear friend Bethany is expecting her second child just a few weeks apart from me and she's expecting a little girl! I've thought about how much fun it would be to have little boys the same age, and little girls about the same age too. So of course I would've been thrilled with a girl as well.
Two nights before we found out I was laying in bed thinking about two dear friends. Both of them due in May 2012. Both of them have lost children before. My first friend lost two boys one at full term, and the second one at 16 weeks. And just a few days earlier she had a GOOD anatomy ultrasound and was very excited to have another little boy! Just as her heart desired.
Then that night I found out another friend who had previously lost her second-born precious little girl, was expecting another girl too! Just as I'm sure she hoped for.
I told Steve that night- "Both of them are having what their heart desired... But I'm not sure what I'm hoping for- boy or girl?" And he responded wisely "Your heart simply desires a healthy baby and the Lord gave us a good ultrasound". And he was right!
So all that to share that while I would've been happy with a sweet little girl, there is no dissapointment and I am just as happy with a sweet little boy! Thank you Lord for graciously allowing me to be pregnant and for giving us the desires of our hearts, even if I don't know what that is at times.
